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Selena Gomez might be dating Justin Bieber, the guy every girl obsesses over, but she still has other crushes too. That’s the great thing about her: she’s growing up and is getting to know herself, but she’s not totally abandoning the girl you fell in love with on Wizards either.
Today, the 18-year-old actress is finding a fierce independence that’s helping her trade the TV life for major movie star status, in July'sMonte Carlo. But more importantly, she’s finding peace in her relationships—including her friendship with Demi—and is opening herself up to the possibility of real love.Seventeen sat down with Selena to talk love, life, and of course, Justin.
17: Your movie, Monte Carlo, is all about growing up and moving on—graduating and taking this first major trip alone. Do you feel as free as Grace is?
SG: Yeah, I’ve definitely gained a lot of that recently. I went on vacation over New Year’s with a bunch of my friends, for the first time, without my parents. That was so much fun. I feel like I’m in a place where I’m on my own a little bit. It’s nice.
17: Traveling with friends is definitely a major milestone. Who would you want to take with you on a trip to Paris (or Monte Carlo)?
SG: I’d love to go on vacation with Taylor [Swift]. I’ve been able to fly to Nashville to see her, and she’ll come to LA a lot, but it’d be nice to get away. It would be really fun. I’ve known Taylor for over three years now, so we’re at the point where we just get each other.
17: Is she your best friend?
SG: I’ve gotten to the point where the label of “best friend” is so ridiculous. If you have three people in your life that you can trust, you can consider yourself the luckiest person in the whole world. I have a lot of wonderful people in my life—probably five, collectively—who I can tell everything to. There’s Jennifer [Stone], my friend Ashley, and Taylor, and my two cousins.
17: Has it always been easy for you with friends? Or have you ever had a friendship fall apart?
SG: Yes. You reflect on the people who used to be in your life, and it’s like, ‘Wow, I can’t believe that person was ever really in my life.’ But people are put into your life for seasons, for different reasons, and to teach you lessons. You’re growing and changing, and eventually, you can go from having all these friends to feeling like you have no one, because you’ve been betrayed, or you’ve gone through things. But in this moment, I’m in such a good place with my friends. I feel confident and I’m happy there are people who I can truly trust in my life.
17: And if a person does betray you, do you ever give second chances?
SG: I believe in second chances, but I don’t believe in third or fourth chances. I love talking through things, and I always want to make things work, if I really love someone, but eventually, if they can’t fix whatever is wrong, or if they’ve done something and then they continue to do it, they’re probably not going to change for anybody. You can’t change a person. Jennifer Stone has told me a thousand times: “You want to be friends with people who double you, not cut you in half.”
17: As far as friends who change, or go through something, you obviously went through that withDemi. Are you two still close?
SG: Yes, of course. There’s an amount of love that can never—no matter what—be taken away or torn apart, no matter the situation. There are certain people who you will always, always love, so if anything, this just reminded me of how much I truly love her.
17: It’s so nice to be able to open yourself up to love that way. Do you feel like you’ve ever been in love before?
SG: I don’t know. I maybe had a first love and had my heart broken, but reflecting on it, I don’t think that was love. I think that was just me being fifteen and going, "Oh my gosh! I know I’m in love. I’m going to marry him." So I don’t think that was love. I think as I’m getting older and having more in-depth relationships, maybe I’ll experience it. At the moment, I don’t know, exactly, if I’ve been in love.
17: But when you did feel like you were in love, how did you deal when it ended?
SG: I’ve very emotional. When I went through my first breakup, I thought it was the end of the world, and I thought I was going to die if I didn’t have him in my life. It was good to cry it out, and just scream, or call my friends in the middle of the night crying. You can’t shut down, you can’t say, ‘What can I do to make this go away?’. You have to let it be painful and get through it. Every day gets better. Because when you’re in love, you kind of give everything and make that person your life. So every day you get more and more of yourself back, and it feels better.
17: You’ve been very private with your relationships in the past, but with Justin, you’ve been more open—you even coordinated Oscars outfits.
SG: I know. That was our prom.
17: Was there a corsage involved?
SG: No, but there should have been!
17: Is there a reason you’ve decided to be more open this time around, with Justin?
SG: I don’t like hiding. I do like to keep certain things to myself, but at the end of the day, I’m eighteen, and I’m going to fall in love. I’m going to hang out with people, and I’m going to explore myself, and I’m okay with that.
17: Since you are more open, you’ve obviously been through a tough time with Justin’s fans. Do you remember being younger, and being a fan with a crush?
SG: Are you kidding me? I’m still thinking Zac Efron’s my husband.
17: Well we hear he’s on the market…
SG: No. I wouldn’t touch that. I love Vanessa [Hudgens] way too much.
17: Do you have anything you wish you could say to Justin’s fans now?
SG: I do see the passion that a lot of these girls have, and it’s beautiful. I love it. I really do. It’s special.
Today, the 18-year-old actress is finding a fierce independence that’s helping her trade the TV life for major movie star status, in July'sMonte Carlo. But more importantly, she’s finding peace in her relationships—including her friendship with Demi—and is opening herself up to the possibility of real love.Seventeen sat down with Selena to talk love, life, and of course, Justin.
17: Your movie, Monte Carlo, is all about growing up and moving on—graduating and taking this first major trip alone. Do you feel as free as Grace is?
SG: Yeah, I’ve definitely gained a lot of that recently. I went on vacation over New Year’s with a bunch of my friends, for the first time, without my parents. That was so much fun. I feel like I’m in a place where I’m on my own a little bit. It’s nice.
17: Traveling with friends is definitely a major milestone. Who would you want to take with you on a trip to Paris (or Monte Carlo)?
SG: I’d love to go on vacation with Taylor [Swift]. I’ve been able to fly to Nashville to see her, and she’ll come to LA a lot, but it’d be nice to get away. It would be really fun. I’ve known Taylor for over three years now, so we’re at the point where we just get each other.
17: Is she your best friend?
SG: I’ve gotten to the point where the label of “best friend” is so ridiculous. If you have three people in your life that you can trust, you can consider yourself the luckiest person in the whole world. I have a lot of wonderful people in my life—probably five, collectively—who I can tell everything to. There’s Jennifer [Stone], my friend Ashley, and Taylor, and my two cousins.
17: Has it always been easy for you with friends? Or have you ever had a friendship fall apart?
SG: Yes. You reflect on the people who used to be in your life, and it’s like, ‘Wow, I can’t believe that person was ever really in my life.’ But people are put into your life for seasons, for different reasons, and to teach you lessons. You’re growing and changing, and eventually, you can go from having all these friends to feeling like you have no one, because you’ve been betrayed, or you’ve gone through things. But in this moment, I’m in such a good place with my friends. I feel confident and I’m happy there are people who I can truly trust in my life.
17: And if a person does betray you, do you ever give second chances?
SG: I believe in second chances, but I don’t believe in third or fourth chances. I love talking through things, and I always want to make things work, if I really love someone, but eventually, if they can’t fix whatever is wrong, or if they’ve done something and then they continue to do it, they’re probably not going to change for anybody. You can’t change a person. Jennifer Stone has told me a thousand times: “You want to be friends with people who double you, not cut you in half.”
17: As far as friends who change, or go through something, you obviously went through that withDemi. Are you two still close?
SG: Yes, of course. There’s an amount of love that can never—no matter what—be taken away or torn apart, no matter the situation. There are certain people who you will always, always love, so if anything, this just reminded me of how much I truly love her.
17: It’s so nice to be able to open yourself up to love that way. Do you feel like you’ve ever been in love before?
SG: I don’t know. I maybe had a first love and had my heart broken, but reflecting on it, I don’t think that was love. I think that was just me being fifteen and going, "Oh my gosh! I know I’m in love. I’m going to marry him." So I don’t think that was love. I think as I’m getting older and having more in-depth relationships, maybe I’ll experience it. At the moment, I don’t know, exactly, if I’ve been in love.
17: But when you did feel like you were in love, how did you deal when it ended?
SG: I’ve very emotional. When I went through my first breakup, I thought it was the end of the world, and I thought I was going to die if I didn’t have him in my life. It was good to cry it out, and just scream, or call my friends in the middle of the night crying. You can’t shut down, you can’t say, ‘What can I do to make this go away?’. You have to let it be painful and get through it. Every day gets better. Because when you’re in love, you kind of give everything and make that person your life. So every day you get more and more of yourself back, and it feels better.
17: You’ve been very private with your relationships in the past, but with Justin, you’ve been more open—you even coordinated Oscars outfits.
SG: I know. That was our prom.
17: Was there a corsage involved?
SG: No, but there should have been!
17: Is there a reason you’ve decided to be more open this time around, with Justin?
SG: I don’t like hiding. I do like to keep certain things to myself, but at the end of the day, I’m eighteen, and I’m going to fall in love. I’m going to hang out with people, and I’m going to explore myself, and I’m okay with that.
17: Since you are more open, you’ve obviously been through a tough time with Justin’s fans. Do you remember being younger, and being a fan with a crush?
SG: Are you kidding me? I’m still thinking Zac Efron’s my husband.
17: Well we hear he’s on the market…
SG: No. I wouldn’t touch that. I love Vanessa [Hudgens] way too much.
17: Do you have anything you wish you could say to Justin’s fans now?
SG: I do see the passion that a lot of these girls have, and it’s beautiful. I love it. I really do. It’s special.